Authenticity is fundamental to the practice of self-love
Hello everyone,
In a recent post, I discussed the pivotal role of self-love in fostering personal happiness. Central to self-love is the practice of authenticity, which involves being truthful to one's thoughts and feelings and expressing them genuinely through words and actions. Authenticity demands from us absolute acceptance of our thoughts, feelings, words, and actions, consistency in allowing our thoughts and feelings to emerge without interference, and the bravery to fully embrace and express our emotions, thoughts, desires, and needs. To simplify, let's refer to this as the "A-C-B Principle" that made up "Authenticity": Acceptance, Bravery, and Consistency.
To illustrate why authenticity is fundamental to self-love practice, let me share three real-life scenarios and explore how a lack of acceptance, consistency, and bravery in expressing thoughts, feelings, desires, and needs can lead to unresolved tensions. I'll avoid delving into the root causes of these scenarios to maintain focus:
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Story 1: In a family, an older brother harbors deep affection for his younger sister. Yet, his interactions with her are expressed by anger, rejection, and discouragement. This discord arises from a failure to acknowledge and communicate their true feelings and intentions, resulting in ongoing tension. The brother is frustrated by his sister's inability to recognize his affection, while the sister is confused and hurt by her brother's seemingly contradictory behavior.
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Story 2: A couple deeply in love faces challenges due to the husband's demanding job, which keeps him at the office for long hours, and the wife's hesitance to disturb him, leading her to suppress her desire for communication. This lack of shared emotions and expressions of longing gradually builds an invisible barrier between them, straining their relationship.
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Story 3: A mother and her daughter, Y, both passionate about cooking, experience a misunderstanding during a meal. The mother's comment about Y nearly finishing a jar of honey, intended as praise for her creativity, is initially met with defensiveness from Y. However, once the mother clarifies her intent to commend Y, the tension dissipates.
These stories highlight a common issue: the failure to accept and express emotions and needs authentically, driven by a misguided belief that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. This lack of authenticity and open communication prevents genuine connections and understanding.
Is practicing authenticity straightforward in today's society? Far from it. It's a challenging endeavor. Yet, embracing authenticity and cultivating virtues like acceptance, consistency, and courage are crucial for achieving lasting happiness. True happiness emerges when individuals can be their most authentic selves, bravely and consistently, and when this authenticity is wholly embraced by themselves and those around them.
Dang Bao Nguyet
